The names Carl J.
I’ve lived an interesting life. Grew up in a small town, graduated and joined the United States Navy. Got into the best shape of my life ever, where doing 100 situps and 67 pushups wasnt difficult. I was fairly active, working out with weights 3-4 days a week. Then Navy debauchery caught up with me, and I started drinking more, I started to lose it.
Got out of the Navy about 25 lbs overweight. Stayed in San Diego for a year, eating horribly at 24 hour carne asada burrito places, still trying to work out. I quit smoking cold turkey and had a huge immediate weight gain of 40 lbs in 2 months.
Started developing medical problems as symptoms started showing. Came home to Austin TX, where I spent one year working in halfway house-corrections, then 4 as a bouncer/head of security/floor manager at a busy 3 level nightclub on Sixth Street here in Austin TX.
Over the years, the poor sleeping habits, the excessive drinking, late nights eating Magnolia queso and pancakes took its toll. As it stood, symptoms going back to right as I got out of the Navy turned into a disease called Lymphedema. Lymphedema, for a short def now, is a noncurable condition in which the lymphatic vessels are damaged/destroyed, so lymph does not properly get recirculated back into the system. The liquid pools into the legs and is absorbed instertially by the tissues (think like a sponge) and the limbs grow greatly in girth.
Depressed with life, no longer working in the nightlife scene (where I didnt have a successful relationship but I did have a bustling social life), things got pretty dark. Weight kept getting worse each year, despite my half-hearted attempts at preventing it from doing so. I spent years fighting off a tremendous suicidal depression as well.
The last few years found me tu rning to The World of Warcraft for recreation, and the inactivity one experiences by being dedicated to this game has caused my weight to balloon even more.
5 times I’ve passed a threshhold, where I had once said before “If I ever get that bad, I’ll kill myself”.
And now, the comorbidities are tremendous.
I suffer from : Lymphedema, hidradenitis suppurativa, high blood pressure, Type II diabetes, a really bad lower back that goes out once a year, BipolarII (although I suspect I’m misdiagnosed) and of course, severely morbid obesity.
And in all shame, in all honesty, I hit my highest mark ever, a few weeks back, of 475 lbs.
There is a difference though. I’ve accepted my addiction, my necessity to medicate my emotions and missing holes with food. I’ve understood for the first time in forever, there isn’t a quick fix. It took me 10 years to get this bad. Its not going to get undone in a year.
But promises made, motivations and dreams renewed, and just a general feeling of “I CAN DO THIS” have led me to this journey of trying to get back and healthy again.
I hope you’ll enjoy the blog. It’ll be a mix of health/fitness/psycho analysis of myself/introspection, and sometimes, brutally honest/funny/icky. Its my story, and I dont believe in cutting corners, so I’ll be putting myself all the way out there.